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Candi

What is my age: 28
Hobby: Horney People Wanting Japanese Swingers
What is my ethnicity: Malaysian
My sexual identity: Gentleman
Hair color: Brunet
What is my Sign of the zodiac: Pisces
What is my body features: My figure features is quite slim
In my spare time I love: Doing puzzles
I have piercing: Ear lobe piercing

Following is our collection of funny Thongs jokes.

About me

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Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. for more information. A guy approaches a beautiful young woman in a short dress at the jukebox. Great thong. This joke may contain profanity.

Thong puns

I was woken late last night about 3am By my next door neighbor in a very revealing negligee, bra, thongs and high heel boots, and asking to borrow a cup of sugar. Trucker is hauling a B-double with three containers full of computer parts. It's getting on toward dark, and so he stops at a steakhouse for a bite. But whatever A bakery owner hired a young female shop assistant A bakery owner hired a young female shop assistant who liked to wear very short skirts and thong panties.

One day a young man enters the store, glances at the shop assistant and at the loaves of bread behind the counter.

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Noticing her short skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brillia Three men are travelling home on Christmas day together As they round a corner their car goes head on into a tree and the three men are instantly killed. While waiting, one of the men points ahead to front of the queue after notici Whats the similarities with Donald Trump's Hair and a thong? They both barely cover the arsehole.

Thongs jokes

Two long time friends meet at the gym. After they finish working out they go into the locker room to shower and change clothes. The other guy says since my wife found them in the glove compartment.

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I saw a young girl busking today with a great voice. Everyone gasped in horror, and the girl slapped me. It's tough being an Elton John fan with a lisp! Do old women wear panties or thongs???? A couple meet in a bar, and over a few drinks discover a mutual interest in kinky sex, so they adjourn back to her place. She excuses herself to go change into something a little more Twenty-some minutes later she comes back out wearing an executioner's hood, elbow length opera gloves, under-bust hourglass corset, spiked thong, stockings, and thigh-high, stiletto heel boots.

She cracks a bullwhip and says, "On Open the bra Open the bra. The wife of a wealthy business man calls their butler into her bedroom while her Thong depends joke is away on a trip for work "Jeeves," she says at once, "take off my dress. Nugent, a retired widow went to the beach wearing a bra and thong. Her husband had died a few years back and after years of mourning she decided it was time to get back in the game.

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And what better way than to go to the beach in a racy, sexy swimsuit to snag a man. In her youth, this plan never seemed to fail although in that time, they didn't have thongs. Three drunk hobos were having an argument over who has the dirtiest underwear "I have the dirtiest boxers in the entire city," says the first hobo. As proof, he takes off his filthy brown stained boxers and throws it at a nearby wall.

Thong jokes

The boxers stuck to the wall for 10 seconds, before peeling off and landing on the ground with a sickening plop. Why are granny panties better than thongs? Because granny panties will cover your ass, but thongs are always trying to get up in your shit. A boy asks his girlfriend over for dinner to meet his parents.

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He tells her he will pick her up at 6 and his parents are seeing a show afterwards, so they will have the house all to themselves. She and the chatty assistant just click and get to talking about Frank went to the gym As he wants to loose weight to get a girlfriend.

Thong jokes

However you must do 1 then 3 then 5 then He accepted the offer and the receptio The wedgie I had during yoga class. Shortly after I moved back to the city I wanted to start up yoga again. I had just come from the mall and bought these adorable little Victoria Secret panties that I had immediately put on. As soon as I sat down in the yoga studio I could start to feel them riding up. How do I A friend of mine used to be a stripper but she got bored with it.

It's always the same old thong and dance. A redditor walks in to bar The bartender says, "what'll you have? What do you call a pirates thong? A whispering eye patch.

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Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office. When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, 'Knicker Stitcher.

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I sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs. Mick w A citizen was cited for a tax investigation in the IRS. Frightened, he asked his ant how to dress. When he asked his lawyer, he told him the exact opposite: -'Don't let them intimidate you. Wear your best suit and most elegant tie' Confused, t Kinky Sex A man was sitting at a singles bar when he was approached by a woman. The woman sat down. What do a thong bikini and Donald's Trump's hair have in common.

They both barely cover the asshole.

The best 16 thong jokes

A Redneck is on his honeymoon As they step into the bedroom, she disrobes. He says, "First, woman, make me a drink". She slips off her panties and says, "Only if you put these on". He begrudgingly obliges and puts his feet Thong depends joke the holes of her lacy thong. At his thighs, the thong won't stretch The girls in the tower It was a rainy night when the man walked into the tower. He saw a single flight of stairs and a door, and when he went past it, it locked itself. In front of him was the most repulsive being you could conceive. The very idea of disgusting.

She winked at the man, and said "Stay with me, or yo My Dad's Best Joke - Not a dad joke My dad was enjoying a smoke break during an in-service training at the police academy. He had taken to smoking Misty cigarettes.

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A friend from a neighboring police force asked him why he was smoking such a feminine cigarette. What do Irish Judges and women have in common?